I’m going to Hawaii for a 12-day solo retreat.

Why?

Many people have asked this.

I’ve kept my answer to “I want to,” “It feels right,” or “I want to spend more time in the sun,” which are all true, but the real truth is, of course, if you know me, much deeper.

Here’s the full truth (and how it came to be):

Realizations During Rasha

During the last month in Austin, Texas, I was introduced to a revolutionary form of quantum healing and consciousness technology called the Rasha. I am no scientist, so I cannot explain the mechanisms of how this technology is working as well as a physicist may, but I can tell you what I know and give you my personal experience.

I have been doing a custom Rasha protocol, with custom frequencies and tracks calibrated for my unique body, mind, and soul, using David Hawkin’s muscle testing. I do three 90-minute sessions a week where I lay down, put on headphones, and let the Rasha run its course.

During these sessions, I have experienced profound healing, received breakthrough insights, had mystical experiences, and released massive stored trauma and dis-ease in the body. My skin has cleared up. My mood is more stable. I exist mostly in a state of internal peace. I’m able to stay in the frequency of unconditional love even when anxiety, low mood, apathy, guilt, shame, and anger arise as if I am watching a dark cloud pass over a blue sky. I’m getting leaner and stronger and working out less. I’m throwing the football better than I ever did in high school. Signs, synchronicities, and miracles happen every day. A new breakthrough project is around the corner (featuring the Rasha).

The insight that sent me seeking the sun, solitude, and deep healing happened during the first session. This is how the Rasha connects to Hawaii.

 ***Warning, I am going to get a bit personal and descriptive.***

For nearly 90 straight minutes during my first session, I experienced a profound healing sensation in my genital area. I could feel the distorted frequencies manifesting in dis-ease stored from years of self-abuse, mistreatment, lack of sun, and lack of love. I realized at the root of my multi-year struggle with sexual performance and intimacy was years of suppressed trauma. For the first time in my life, I (and the Rasha) sent the frequency of unconditional love to my genital area, and I felt it beginning to heal!

After this session, a few things became crystal clear:

1) I was done wearing polyester or spandex compressions, shorts, or underwear. I understood on an experiential level why I should wear 100% cotton.

2) I realized since 13 years old, masturbation was not something I did out of love, but out of abuse. I never could find a good enough reason to stop until feeling the consequences of years of this action during this Rasha session.

3) I wanted to move somewhere warm and tropical for the next few months off the grid by myself so I could sun myself naked, and not only heal my genital area, but also my entire body.

Point number 3 is what sent me on the search for my next move, and a newfound hobby of reading Tarot cards began to reveal to me what I deeply wanted next.

(By the way: I never thought I’d talk about this stuff publicly. But as I become free from the years of harbored guilt and shame, there is less emotional weight behind these words because I’m doing the processing in solitude. I also know sharing this deeper, vulnerable things publicly sets me free from them as well. What we keep in the dark keeps us in shame, guilt, and self-hatred. What we bring to the light sets us free. When we bring darkness up to the light, it vanishes, as darkness cannot exist in the presence of life.)

The Fool & The Sun

Let’s back up a few weeks to when I returned to Austin from my journey with ayahuasca in Peru. I was advised by a Vedic Astrologist to walk into a spiritual store, choose a Tarot deck that spoke to me, and begin to play around with it. Luckily, a witch shop was just across the street from my hotel, and so I went in, and instantly fell in love.

It felt like I’d walked into a magic shop on Diagon Alley in Harry Potter, except I wasn’t in Universal Studios, I was in real life. They had crystals, candles, incense, sage, esoteric books, wands, and Tarot Cards all around the store, and in my state of expanded awareness post ayahuasca, I was so down for all of it. I browsed for a Tarot deck that spoke to me, and landed on one with a picture of a prince-like guy with long blonde hair stepping out over a cliff. I’d seen visions of myself with long blonde hair on ayahuasca, and felt this was the deck for me. I’d later learn the cover of this deck was the card “The Fool,” and I picked it because I was the living embodiment of the spirit of this card.

Once I chose this deck, there was also a girl there doing official Tarot readings who said she’d help me do my first one. She taught me the basics, helped with my first self-reading, and I instantly fell in love with the game. Over the next few weeks, I went from having no idea how to read Tarot to reading for myself nearly every day, making life decisions with my intuition and Tarot over my rational brain, and even hosting 10+ Tarot reading calls virtually.

Now, back to the Rasha and the realization around healing. After that session, I repeatedly pulled two cards - The Fool and the Sun. Other people would pull The Fool for me. I spread 72 cards out on my kitchen table, felt into the deck, and pulled the Fool. At my retreat with Danny Miranda and Jack Sweeney, we intuitively knew which card out of the 72 was The Fool again, and that sent Danny into the pool.

I felt so connected to this card. But at the same time, I was conflicted. Did I want to take a leap of faith and go on another adventure in the sun, like this summer in Thailand, or did I want to go back to Illinois and play football? Could I maybe do both? I didn’t know for sure, and existing in this in-between state for a few weeks was faith-testing.

Signs & Synchronicities

I got the final confirmation about football when I visited Illinois Benedictine the day after I returned from Austin, and as I was in the locker room trying on the jersey and helmet, Aaron Rodgers was on the screen talking about ayahuasca. How I came back to football and why ayahuasca was a big part of it is a whole other story which I’ll save for another time. But once playing football in Illinois was clear in my mind, I realized going and healing in the sun before spending a cold winter in Illinois was still so important to me.

The signs had previously been pointing me to Hawaii, like a friend who lives on Hawaii I met in Thailand texting me out of nowhere, a song on a new spiritual album I found being called “Hawaii’s song,” or finding a friend Amy’s book in a coffee shop about her adventure to Hawaii. But the signs had dried up as I shifted my focus to Illinois and football. Again, I was conflicted.

I thought maybe I’d go back to Santa Teresa in Costa Rica for a few weeks, or join Danny Miranda’s retreat in LA. Hawaii seemed so far. But at this point, I simply didn’t know, and so I asked God to make the decision for me. The next day, He did.

My phone screen had been broken for a few weeks, and on this random Tuesday, I decided to go fix it. I walked into Verizon but they told me to go down the street to UBreakIFix. When I walked into the store, the kid working there, probably around my age, looked so familiar. I asked him if he went to my high school, and he said, “No, bro, I’m from Hawaii.” I started laughing and said, “Thank you so much, you’ve just clarified my decision to go to Hawaii next week.”

The next day, I booked a ticket to Kona, found out I “coincidentally” have two cousins who live in Kona out of all of the islands, and booked 12 days in a secluded AirBnB near the coast. I’m writing this letter as I’m en route!

A 12-Day Walkabout

I first heard of the idea of a “walkabout” from Matthew Mcconagheys’s legendary book “Greenlights.” This book was the seed of inspiration for my European travels a few summers ago, and Mcconaghueys walkabout was the inspiration for doing my first 12-day walkabout at 20 years old in Sevilla, Spain.

A walkabout is essentially a solo retreat where you walk away from society, sit with yourself, and introspect on your life.

As I’m in the airport this morning, I walk by a book stand, see Greenlights, flip to a random page, and boom - the walkabout. Another day, another wink from God.

I feel these 12 days for me will be deeply restorative, healing, and expansive. I don’t have any set plans, but I imagine I’ll be doing a technology and food fast, getting really clear and quiet internally, and opening myself up to divine synchronicity and insight. I feel called to do a 12-video series on my journey over the next few years. I also know I’m going to be lying in the sun naked a lot haha.

How crazy is it that in my 23 years of life, my entire body has only seen the sun maybe once or twice!? How crazy is it they we live in a society where it is seen as weird or esoteric to lay naked in the grass and the sun? How far have we fallen from our nature?

“It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society.” ~ Jiddu Krishnamurti

One Final Adventure

This feels like the end of one chapter and the beginning of a new one.

This morning, I applied for a 12-month lease in Illinois. I am committed to playing quarterback for Illinois Benedictine. I will be studying psychology and finishing my degree. For the first time since I was 18, I’m going to be grounding myself, and I’m super excited. I feel my root chakra needs it, my body needs it, and my bank account needs it.

After traveling to dozens of countries, launching dozens of offers and businesses, living month to month with expenses, and being nomadic for the past few years, my spirit is ready for a season of grounding, integrating, and building a foundation. I’ve been so deep in the plant medicine, shamanic, psychic, mystical, spiritual, and 4D/5D realms for the past few months I feel it will be good for me to ground myself back into 3D reality with my new awareness.

This 2 1/2-year chapter of my life has been nothing short of a blessing, a movie, and genuine magic. It will be a book. Adventure, travel, and exploration will always be a part of my character. I may go back out on the road after this next year in Illinois, but I’ve learned I cannot both plan that far ahead and stay open and surrendered to God simultaneously.

For now, I’m surrendering to life and traveling once again to Hawaii. Even though it’s a 12-day trip, with how fast life moves, I expect to be a changed person on the other side.

Until then, enjoy your next few weeks, and I will be in touch soon.

I love you,

Jack

PS

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